What Are Your Love Languages?

Gail Wicht Health Coach Life Coach
Why is it beneficial to know your love language/s?

We all express our love in different ways.
Once you are aware of the way you express it, it can really benefit you and the people around you. 

Romantic relationships can be challenging and anything that will help to make things easier is always welcome.
But it doesn’t only help in romantic relationships, it can help with friendships, in the work space and with your children and family.

What are love languages? 

Love languages are the ways in which you show your love for another person. It shows that you respect others, such as people in your work space. 
They are also ways in which you would like to receive love. 

When you know how you like to give and receive love you are able to communicate this to your partner. They will know how you feel loved and make you feel special. It sounds unromantic, but this can be the missing link that you need to make your relationship successful. Imagine you keep doing your love language for your partner but they do not get as much meaning out of it as you do. You could feel defeated. You could wonder why they do not appreciate everything you do for them and start to feel resentful. 
Just remember, these are not tools for manipulating people to do something for you or to like you. 

The Love Languages:
  • Acts of Service – You like to do things for your loved ones such as making tea or coffee for them, loading the dishwasher, taking over from the other person when they are tired. These things you do willingly and not because you have to do them. It makes you feel happy that you are helping. You love it when your partner runs errands for you or does a chore without being asked.

  • Quality Time – You enjoy personal time and attention with the special people or person in your life. It can be something as simple as wanting your partner to come shopping with you, to snuggle on the couch chatting, or to go and exercise together.

  • Physical Touch – You love hugs and kisses and to be close to your loved ones. You likely often touch their hair or face or put your arm around someone. You love to receive this too. With friends you could just touch their arm while chatting with them.

  • Words Of Affirmation – You enjoy it when someone tells you they are proud of you, or that you did a good job with something, it boosts you where you want to do more. You feel very loved and filled with confidence when your partner tells you that you look attractive. You will very often be giving words of encouragement to others too.

  • Receiving and Giving Gifts – You absolutely love giving gifts to people, big or small. It lights you up seeing them with the gift you picked out for them.
    You feel loved when your partner picks out gifts for you and you can’t wait to see what they got you for your birthday. 

You could have 1 or 2 primary love languages with a third close behind. All of these expressions of love are important to you. 

Perhaps you know what yours is already by just observing yourself. Observe your partner and see if you can work out what theirs is. 

Once you know what yours is, figure out if it is genuine or if it is a people pleasing, survival mechanism that you learned in childhood to keep the peace.

There are many love language quizzes online, click here to try them out.

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